26 feb 2010

sms u when i get up ... well today dunno why i was so darn tired...

then when i sms u ... u also jus only wake up ... and then i ask u whether u wanna go out eat lunch with me n u say ok ,... cos i miss u oh ... and u too cos when yesterday i call u say i going to bed u tell me u miss me too hahah ... hmmm then after tat my fren call me out then i tell u ...

and u sms me ask me wat time de go sleep lo ... then i dint reply u call me hahah ... so sweet ...

so after lunch ... u went back home n i followed n then u sleep i watch tv ... when u sleep the time u keep hugging me while i sit next to u n watch tv ... how sweet >.<... then ur fren called n call u to go gamble u bring me as well... u gamble i watch tv swt ... haha after u finish then u tell me u feel lik going genting swt after we dinner n lent ic from ur fren ... we went to genting ... with ur another fren ...in genting while we walking oso u still hold my hands ... plus today i wear the shirt u say too sexy de ... u feel tat u dun lik haha ...u 1st time worry of me wearing cloths oh...

27 feb 2010

once i wake up i sms u agian ... dunno why i lately keep wanna see u ... i really feel so wanna see u ... n my sms waken u ... n then you actually wanted to go jungle walking but in the end becos u wanna company me u didnt go ... n u ended up watching movie with me... at 1st we were very happy got laugh n talk in the car ... i feel so so happy u these few days make me feel very happy ... bring me go here n there ... so in the end u wanna watch the movie call HERE COMES FORTUNE

well i wanted to watch big small soldier but in ther end i jus listen to u bah cox u already risk not going mountain climbing for me ... i cant say anything lo ... hmmm but u buy the ticket is at 2.15pm ... which i n u also havent eat breakfast ... n we only left with 30 min to eat ... well... i asked u with a good manner tat whether we have time to eat meh ?? then u used a very loud and lik scolding tone to reply me ... saying why no time to eat oh ... then wat u want ah ,,... eat faster la... hais u say how will i still have the happy face to see u leh ?? then when we get into the car i call u park the car we eat at the shopping mall .. u say i too much de.... hais... ( where will a ppl will still smile when anothe people scold u de leh ??) then we eat in a restaurant ... i already control my self not to show u faces... show u my temper ... n i was suffering from flu stucking on my nose i cant breath properly .. then we neve talk till after movie... even during movie i hold ur hands n hug u ... u also no reaction i know tat u already very angry me.... then we go up to the car u say u wanna fetch me home cos u dun wanna see my black face ... but i bag u i still wanna see u ... so we went to ur house ... even how i hug u oso u dun giv a damn abt it ... hais... till after dinner with ur fren ... only u start to talk back with me hais ... finally leh .. during dinner oso i know u no more angry me de when u take vege for me haha ... then after that we go ur house watch tv till abt 9.30 ... ur fren call ask u whether u wanna go clubbing .. i know u wont go de ... but u say becos of me ... u go .. hahaha ... really ma?? u send me home n change... then 11pm u pick me up again ... then we went to get ur frens n go to maisoon to wait de... b4 we went in ... u tell me today ur single and available ... then i tell u i oso single and available loh then ... then u lik got a bit not song ... haha ... thx for paying for me ... then when get in u usually wont take picture with me but today u take a lot pic with me oh ... then u see me dancing only ... i really have fun with jodee ... and u only stand there and see us ... haha ... hmmm well after i finish dancing with jodee i came back to u n dance with u ... dunno u say before u wanna see me dance in clubbing b4 and now u see de so wats ur opinion leh ?? very cha leh ... haha ... hmmm and u got kiss me n tell me u love me very much in my ear ... i so happy oh !!! ... today u total tell me ilove u this 3 words abt 2 times de!!! ... and take picture with me i very happy de...

28 feb 2010

today u went mountain climbing ... and me i wait u at home till 4pm... u say i change not become last time de yin ping cos i usually always nag u y neve bring me out .. but i lately dun feel lik u bringing me out becos when go out i cant have quality time with u de,... well then i have dinner with ur family ... u keep asking me y ur mom treat me so good ... then i really feel lik asking u y ur mom dint treat ur ex so good ma?? ... i keep wanna act sleep cos i wanna over night in ur house...( lately i act sleep oso same reason)... but everytime when i wanna do so .. u sure need to go out with ur frens.. hais .. so at night go ur fren house to gamble... they saw me lik see ghost only lik very surprise y i will come with u ... n keep asking me wats our relationship ... what should i answer frens?? best frens?? ai mei ?? or gf ?? i really dunno ... so i cincai answer them only ... i m confuse whether to ask u back together or not ... becos i know ur answer will still be the same... we broke up 1 month de ... so fast one month de... and me i still got 4 more week then trial exam de... i dunno whether i can put full attention on my studies when i thinking abt u ... i know i sound childish ... but its the truth i cant lie u n my self ... i hope till i exam u will still there to support me and be with me... i scare when u not here to do so .. i scare i will just cry and not study ... hope we will be back as couple in the future... i will wait ... no matter wat ...

12 feb 10

eventhough we r not consider as bf or gf ?? .. but our relationship is still maintaining as gf n bf ...

i m really confused whether u treat me as ur gf or jus frens?

but u tell me u didnt tell ur frens n ur mom abt us breaking up ...

even we r not together de... n u didnt tell ur frens or parents or family ...

but i feel tat i dun have the name of ur gf ... make me feel unsecured ...

make me feel u will one day run away from me... tats wat i scared...

when i ask u can we be back togather again ?...

u jus tell me u wan time but i cant help my self to ask u again ...

whether we can be back togather u jus tell me ...

dun be so annoying can or not ... hais... i m sad n confuse ... wat u want me to do wor!!!

13 feb..

today we went out becos i wanna unbarred my line n buy duck for dinner...

is me who bag u to go out with me...

n u agree ... when i webcam with u ... i already can see tat u cut ur hair de,,,

then when i see u in person i see tat u dye ur hair...

actually frankly saying ... u look more fashionable then the ming yau i used to know 5 months ago ...

u become from an uncle kinda look till more fashionable...

honestly i m scare tat u do all these is to jus go out to a party n find some gurl to be ur gf...

but i bluff u said tat u look lik lala chai ...

i can see ur face turn really unhappy after tat ... ( if u dun love / have feeling towards me if i say something lik u look ugly actually u wont mind at all but u turn unhappy after tat prove one thing u still love me n care of me)

then i ask you one question ... will you be jealous when other guys talk with me now??

u said u wont be jealous u will only think abt it ... ( at least he think abt it )

today i m jus happy to see u ... seriously after we broke up ... i only jus hope for one thing ...

is to see u more often ... tats it ... i didnt want more demand other then tat ...

14 feb

today is valentine day ...

well everyone will go out with the one they love most .... n me yes i surely will find u lor...

cos i still love you a lot ... so when i wake up ... the 1st thing i do is thinking how to ask u out ..

so i send a sms to u ... ask u whether r u free or not ... u reply say u r free...

i was jumping joy when i saw ur message... u come out with me is already a present from u to me .... i m happy for it liao ... we planned to watch movie... i neve though tat CNY still got so many ppl watch movie.. so i planned to go mid valley ... but unfortunately i was wrong ... the place is pack!!! lik shit ... n we cant get tickets... when we reach to signature ... i seriously dunno where to buy tickets from there...then he scold me ... say ... y u always do thing also neve plan before you do ... the instant u say me lik tat i feel lik crying already ... i really dun feel lik talking anymore ... beocs yes ur right ... i didnt planned everything nicely ... becos i neve predict tat u will say yes to come out with me if not i will already buy tickets to surprise u again... but in the end... u calm down yourself n tell me u wanna drink coffee ... i know when ur mad u wont so fast calm down ... i can see ur trying ur best de... so we went to a coffee shop to play monopoli ... i know it sound lik so bored but as simple as it seems... i feel happy already .... when we were heading to high way ... he said wanna fetch me home but i still wanna see him so i said i wanna go to ur house... ur mom gave me a big ang pau n u saw n ask me y she treat me so good... ( at 1st i oso dunno why but now i know why liao ) ...

15 feb

today 3 am ... after i play poker n my fren were drunk ... we went yum cha... n one of them bag their car .... i sms u wat happen ... u were so worried till u called me immediately n ask me anything happen to me or not ... i was so damn happy after i put down the phone...

n such a coincident that u will also go the same place to yum cha with ur frens...

so in the afternoon ... i planned to not sms u at all.. actually i planned to stop this relationship ...

i tired n i cant do it ... i though if i dint sms u ... u will oso not sms me ... but i was wrong again...

u did ask me wat m i doing n ask me where m i ....

i cant control my self... so the next thing i know is i call u ... n tell u wat m i doing ... n u tell me u wanna watch movie with me... i was lik OH MY GOSH ... i feel so so so happy becos usually i m the one who ask u out but today is ur the one...

then i rush back home n dint went to my 2nd aunt's house... becos i wanna see u ... but u ffk me... say tat u wanna sleep... when i was ready n waiting for u n ffk my aunty yes i was really really mad... then we started argue again ...

18 feb

these few days ... i learned my lesson i neve really feel lik going out with u ...

i dun hope to get disappointment from u again... may be i m scared de... seriously ... after the day ... we argued ... i seriously really really scare u will disappoint me again...

but today ... i wake up at 10 something actually wanted to see whether u wake de or not ...

but u neve reply n so i was tired too so i went back to sleep ... planned that when u reply me only i wake up again ... but he didnt sms me but in abt 1pm he called me ask me whether wanna go out eat with him... i was shock... n havent get ready n he wanna go out now ... swt .. so i give up ... i really think tat i can see u today... but after i dint get ready ... i was disappointed de... cos as ur character u wont bother abt me de... so i oso lik hais sure no chance to go out with u de la... but u then sms me tell me to get ready n wanna go out with me... wow i was damn happy ... fast fast get ready ... n bring me go watch movie... out with ur frens as well... together with ur frens we r still couples... n u hold my hands.. by ur self... i feel lik i m dreaming ... then after movie i went to ur house a while... then go out eat dinner with ur frens ... n planned to watch movie again... actually telling the truth ... i was jealous of marcus n his gf ... yes i kinda ask .. y marcus can treat his gf so good...n y u cant ... but after today experience ... they were arguing in front of us while we were havin dinner... n u said dun teach bad things ... haha ... n u can oso be the bf i wan u to be ... lik today ... u take vege for me while eating dinner... n hold my hands... sweet gila...

20 feb...

once i get up ... the 1st thing i did was sms u ... then take bath n get ready my self... becos i dun wanna experience lik tat day ... u say go out with ur fren eat n i will disappointed ... i scare of disappointment de ... i ask him whether i can go out with him .. he say can ... the answer he gave me lik i win a lottery only loh!!! so damn high de feeling ... then i dress up my self... n then go out eat breakfast with u de... i though tat u will fetch me home after we finish our meal.. becos i called u uncle... haha ... but u didnt ... so i went to ur house to watch movie with u ... i can hug u .. really feel really nice when i hug u ... i company u see doctor n then went back ur house to sleep afternoon nap ... then at night eat reunion dinner with ur parents n ur mom fren... 1st time oh !!

n u oso bring me up to genting with ur frens oh !!!... haha yes i cant go in casino ... i was disappointed... n u though i was showing faces... tell u the truth ... when i wanna go to 3rd casino door... i stomach pain haha .. wana go toilet ... ahahha .... so after u went into casino ... the 1st thing i did was find toilet ... then only go play arcade game ... may be becos i wanna go toilet face make u feel i was angry of u ... no la... i m not ... when you come out n company me back ... i feel lik eh y u so fast come out de... cos usually he won come out tat fast de lo ... then i ask him ... only he tell me he though i was angry .. haha see when u tell me wat u were thinking ... is so easy to settle the problem on the spot ... when fetching me home de time... u tell me u love me ... haha ... today u tell me twice u love me oh ... so so so happy leh !!!!

24 feb

few days de cant see u ... so so so freaking miss u lik hell !!!.... but nowadays i learned something new... even we r only " bfgf" with a "" on top... but i feel lik i m ok with it de... cos i feel happy ... n u still love me ... i can feel it ... haha n i learned how to not show u faces in front of u ... n oso not to get so disappointed when u go out with ur frens n not with me... haha ... today ... i finally can see u de!!!... so damn happy ... you know i really looking forward to today start from monday ??... i neve really have this kinda feelings... really ... i planned everything with my brother... cos usually i need to fetch him n my sis on wed ... but i tell him my plan n he agree... so finish class at 9 am ... i rush back home to cook breakfast for u since u was telling me dun wanna go out eat breakfast ... from morning i keep on thinking wat the hell to cook for u ... seriously ... very mafan to think ... but at the end i found the answer de... haha ... finish cooking by using half an hour... n then i called u ... i walk to ur house... i feel so so so wanna see u while walking there... then when i reach ur house... u joke with me saying tat ur car sold de... swt ... then u continue sleep... i sleep beside u ... n wake up at 1230pm... when sleeping u help me put blanket i feel so so sweet oh ... haha ... when u become so good de... then u bath de then kiss my lips tell me tat u wanna go eat breakfast ... i wanna see ur reaction when u eat my meal i ready for u ... but in the end u say it taste ok but when i taste the egg bread it taste lik shit only ... u still eat finish i feel kinda lik husband n wife loh !!!... hmmm then we watch tv in ur house... n u keep hugging me... happy leh me... then went bank a while ... n then go out lunch ... u usually won bring me to high class places for a meal... but u bring me to this new restaurant ... kopi bar... haha ... tats really expensive meal.. thx.. n then back to ur house wtach tv n yum cha with ur fren u drive motor out with me i 1st time giv u liao lor... haha so scary cos i neve ride on it b4 ... till night ... lol... we go yum cha aagin...even its only so simple ... but i m happy with it de...haha most happy thing is today ... ur fren call u go out play mah jiong usually u will go but u dint cox u say u wanna company me ... lol sweet nya...hias but still got 3 more days... u need to go out station de...

i hope i can see u enough ... before u go out station can ma?? ... becos i really miss u a lot !!

chinese new year...

lol from the cny eve ...

i had reunion dinner with my family ... hahah ...

then after reunion dinner i had ntg to do ...

then a sms from kah kay ... telling me tat she wanna go genting...

cos wanna try her car,,, swt right?

then i called kelvin to join us n there we go ... genting ...

haha obviously its kinda bored up there... but we get to watch fire works... n jus in time...

hahah ... then yum cha in genting ahhah

valentine day n also cny 1st day ...

guess who i went out with ??

hahah shhhh... its a secret ....

well we both actually planned to watch movie...

but unfortunately ... mid valley too many ppl was there...

then we ended up playing monopoly in a coffee shop ...

simple n nice?? haha ... then later on i went to his house...

n take ang pau ... haha ... then after tat he fetch me home...

n then my frens came to my house to gamble ...

including shee ken ,tjun jin, ken jin, chee peng , ah ling , asmund , kelvin and kah kay ...

lol we play till crazy de... with my a bit help with my vodka....

then after tat we went out yum cha,,,, then they got bit tipsy de...

so they kinda crush their car... well n i told the person i went out today ...

he get so worried n call me immediately wow?? hahah

n such a coincidence i saw him there yum cha too hahah

second day of cny ... i waited for my aunt to come to my house to bai nian ...

waited from 11am till 1 pm only she come ... wth ??

then we had lunch n me n my family went to my father side aunty ...

yea... its very very very bored there in her house ... i fall asleep de!!!

then a message came telling me he wanna watch movie with me ...

so i actually needed to go another aunty house later on ...

but in the end becos of him ... i dint.. n then when i reach home he call me to wait for him till 10 pm...

but instead ... when 10 pm ... he told me he lazy n wanna sleep ...

so ... i got so so so mad... then my fren sms me to go out,,, instead they come my house again to play gambling ... n fire works...

third day of cny ...

well basically ... i went to my mom side of the family ... we had a very very full lunch ..

n yee sang also .. then go to my aunty house to gamble a while...

n who know my father gamble also ... n also very very "yellow"

he won so many money swt ??

hmmm then after finish gambling we continue our journey to go another aunty house who i dint get to go yesterday ...

after finish dinner .. i quickly get ready to go genting with kah kay again....

with joining my cousins.... had a lots of fun playing arcade games swt ...

i feel lik i m small again,,,

forth day of cny ....

i need to get up at 10 am.... jus to follow my frens go bai nian ...

lol ?? 1st house kah mun's house... then kah kay house... then my house...

then after tat we give up n we go sing k ... sing till 8 pm ... lol ?? then who knows...

me n kay was tired go back my house rest a while...

then fetch kah mun ... then we decided to go genting... swt again...

we are being addicted with the road... hahah

fifth day of cny ... i went out with a guy ... again.. hahha

with him i watch movie called 72tenants of prosperity

haha ... then while waiting for the movie ... we went to snooker ...

he n his fren play snooker... n me i sit there n eat my food...

then back to the movies again ....

tat movie its really funny !!1 u all should watch it when u r feeling down??

but its really really nice to watch ...

then after movie ... we went to his house.. to rest a while... then we had dinner...

in midah n we wtach 2nd movie again ...

called the 14 blade may be i m not tat into that movie i feel its kinda bored,...

i almost fall asleep in the movie ... swt .... then after tat we head home...

everyone wants wanna celebrate valentine day with the one they love...

when u read the above passage ... u sure have the name of tat special someone in ur mind right now

so why wait?? ... go ask he or she out ... u neve know the answer till u ask ...

but as for me...

i hate valentine day ...

i 3 years straight i lose my bf during the coming valentine...

when i was in form 5 ... i realize i dun love him anymore... then i said the two hush words...

when last year... me n my bf broke up becos we were not happy together... and then ended the relationghip...

when this year... its the same case tat me n my bf doesnt go well with each other... then we ended up breaking up...

yea 3 years i dint celebrate with my bf ... and i will get really really jealous when i see my fren's bf brought them teddy bear... chocolate... gift... cards with some sweet notes...

candle light dinner.. some romantic stuff...

but all these... i neve really experience b4...

at least last year i have 3 guys asking me to be his valentine ...

but now ... one also dun have .. hais ... and i only wish tat one will ask me out...

but i know tat he isnt a romantic person so i bet he won do anything oso ...

and this year chinese new year is on valentine day as well...

so my hope ?? jus faded away...

so i jus hate broken hearts on valentine day ...

hais its jus hurt when u go out n see so many couple around n your single...

why celebrate valentine day when everyone is single anyways??

but people always say love is in the air...

u wil found the right one when time comes...

sorry abt these few day neve have the time to upload my blog n now i will upload !!!

well... as i know valentine days coming ...

so HELP UNIVERSITY COLLEGE have organize a valentine event in the college...

where everyone need to pay rm 20 for entrance fee...

and then the event was a disaster

not a lot people turn up ...

and the proportion of food is way too little ...

but there are hitz . fm cruse there ...

where we play some fun game n win some cool prices...

well i got 7 place... n then i won a hand lotion .. how abt tat??

and then ...kah mun won two tickets to cosmo world ...

n she gave it to me... swt??

i go with who oh ?? ....

anyways we really feel very bored of the event its wasting time n money ...

so decided to head to chilis for dinner... cos neve eat ??

so ..we have more fun being in chilis then the event so how suck is it??

friday morning went to pavilion with kah mun my sis ...

cos kah mun wants to do last min shopping for CNY ...

finiding a skirt to match with her tops...

if i m not mistaken ... we been into 10 shops till we found the right one for her...

n me i oso cant help my self to buy something!!

i hate u kah mun !!!

yea... then ... we watch VALENTINE DAY the movie...

walau ... is really very very very very nice!!!!

you alll readers should watch it... especially for gurls out there...

yes u ... you should watch with ur bf ..

becos u all may need a shoulder to cry on ...

glad to have my sis beside me to share the pain n feelings in me...

hahah ... hmmm i had fun being with my best frens...

fuck you

Look inside
Look inside your tiny mind
Now look a bit harder
Cause we're so uninspired, so sick and tired of all the hatred you harbor

So you say
It's not okay to be gay
Well I think you're just evil
You're just some racist who can't tie my laces
Your point of view is midieval

Fuck you
Fuck you very, very much
Cause we hate what you do
And we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch

Fuck you
Fuck you very, very much
Cause your words don't translate
And it's getting quite late
So please don't stay in touch

Do you get
Do you get a little kick of being slow minded?
You want to be like your father
It's approval your after
Well that's not how you find it

Do you
Do you really enjoy living a life that's so hateful?
Cause there's a hole where your soul should be
Your losing control of it and it's really distasteful

Fuck you
Fuck you very, very much
Cause we hate what you do
And we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch

Fuck you
Fuck you very, very much
Cause your words don't translate and it's getting quite late
So please don't stay in touch
Look inside
Look inside your tiny mind
Now look a bit harder
Cause we're so uninspired, so sick and tired of all the hatred you harbor

Fuck you
Fuck you very, very much
Cause we hate what you do
And we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch

Fuck you
Fuck you very, very much
Cause your words don't translate and it's getting quite late
So please don't stay in touch

neutrons growth

a new produce neutrons will growth when someone learn something new....

today i finally open my mind into one thing

when someone ask me...

" I THOUGH COLLEGE PEOPLE ALWAYS GO OUT DA WHY U DIDNT ??"

then i realize ...

yea lo y i dint go out often de???

i though i really love to go clubbing ...

and when i realize when i dint go ?? hmmm yea when my ex bf scold me ...

then i scared to go de...

why m i not always going out with frens de??

becos of my ex bf i only want to fullfill my time jus being with him ....

and then my frens slowly slowly lost contact and now ??

frens gone ...

i love to go out ... i love to fool around play around... where is the yin ping tat always go out ??!!!

dunno ... i jus realize when i lost my lover as well as i lost my own self...

i lost some of my frens...

most of all .. i lost my life...

my life now isnt interesting as last time.. well becos ... only i think its you you and more you ....

and i know why u think i m so so so "fan" becos i dun have a life n i wanna inter fear with urs...

realize and its too late ....

today i went to "TIAN HOU GONG"

jus to pray .... for my result ... haha ... exam coming ... well

n help my mom to pray as well ....

and then i know this sound ridiculous ...

but then .... god really kinda giv me the answer towards my question ...

well i dunno but its really to cheer me up after wats going on with my life...

may be i should jus do watever it is and get on with my own life...

so coincident the couple is taking picture for their marriage

What day is it? And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time

Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

There's something about you now
I can't quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right

Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

What day is it?
And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive

for you Ming Yau

i know u for almost 6 months de...

i remember when the 1st day we meet ...

we were having a yum cha section in stevents corner

where i dunno y i feel i can talk a lot when i were with u ...

i feel really comfortable when i with u the 1st day ...

becos i talk a lot ... compare when i with judson ...

still remember he chasing me tat time ... yea...

i really feel when i was with him i feel tat i m not my self...

n when i was with u ... i really feel wow i can talk so much ...

then the 2nd day going out with u was when u wanted to go alliance bank ...

i company u go n u yum cha with ur frens as well....

the 1st time i see ur frens bring out other gurls...

n u tell me they r lala ... u dun like this kinda gurls...

i really feel tat ur so cute ... y u need to tell me leh ??

i still remember i was being move by u ...

when my father went into the hospital ...

i really feel my heart has broken apart and u want to go to the hospital to company me....

but i push ur offer becos... i dun want my father to know you as u were not yet my bf....

my father start knowing u went i brought durian back to the house...

and assume its ur buying for my family ....

the trick really took my father heart ....

after tat he seem lik always ask me about u until when i start crying for u in-front of him...

then he knows wats going on ... we broke up de....

i always lik when u bring me out becos of me ...

not beocs of ur frens... call u out only u call me....

actually being with u i really learned a lot....

at least i m not the "dun know anything " kinda gurl i m b4 ....

at least u teach me wats true love ....

at least u make me know tat how much i love you ... more then any guys tat i dated....

at least u make me know tat loving each other doesnt means we need to be together ....

at least you love me b4 n after we broke up ... u still treat me so good....

i now really regret why i dint appreciate when the time i be with you ...

n ywhy i need to comment a lot of wat ur actually trying to do ...

at least i learn my lesson tat i should en control everything in a relationship...

as i m a control sive person

after we broke up and get back together again i started to write dairy remind my self how bad and good you treat me... n now its time for u to see wat i wrote....

the 1st day when we get back together is on 10 January

i ask you to come out to discuss abt us again ....

i cried in front of you .... i really wanted to hug u tat time n hold ur hands...

i feel so sad when i ask u ... u still love me ??

you said u dun know.... n u still accepted to get back together with me ....

i was really happy tat time ... but when u say u wanna go out with ur frens...

i m being childish again ... wanted to follow u go ...

i m so happy when u pass the money n call me lao poh help me keep the money ....

its really sweet .... i will always remember ....

11 jan

2nd day we get back together ... this is the day when we kissed the longest

when u wanted to go ur frens house

you neve ask me whether i wanted to go or not ...

then you just bring me along only ... i really want tat i want u to control me....

i feel happy when u have this decision in ur mind de....

i really wanted to tell u how much i m happy tat day ....

when i playing psp the time u touch my head with ur hand i feel lik i m being protected ....

i feel lik a children again ...

when u fecth me home ... you kiss me n day u love me a lot... you really make me feel lik flying ...

i m happy ~!!! really soo soo sooo happy ....

but when we were out side with ur frens... i jus feel very useless y ur frens n thier gf can be so good n we dint even talk to each other i m so jealous...

12 jan

i went out with my fren today ... when i saw this ''kuih ''

u told me u lik to eat i buy for u ... but in the end you dint get to eat it ... becos

u went out with ur frens to drink beer....

13 jan

in so so many months you finally date me out ...

we go pasar malam together... and you send me a email in facebook to remind me happy 4 months togehter.... but u neve change u still bring me go pub ...

but at least u got bring me out with u leh ... hahah

then when you sms me tell me good night ... i sleep de neve saw ur message leh ...

15 jan

i today really miss you a lot a lot ah!!! but also good de...

you got at least call me tell me where r u going out with ur frens... and when u reach home you also got tell me you reach home de.... we dint go out becos i go wedding dinner with family so cant go out with u ...

17 jan

yesterday i dint go out with him also becos i go wedding dinner again .... and when i reach home also 12 am de so i also know tat he wont go out with me de la...

cos he lazy pig lai de ma hahah....

so better sleep only lo ...

and i know tat i wanna sleep late a bit so i off my phone sound and sleep de .... haha but u send message to me at 3am ... telling me u cant sleep i dint reply becos i still sleeping ....

when i get up i feel yer i missed a chance de!!! i wanna go crazy de i really miss u a lot!!

but u still need to company ur cousin tat come from sarawak...

hais today also no chance to go out with u de la ..

18 jan

the forth day neve see you de.... i dunno why i ahve the feeling lik you r ignoring me ...

n hiding away from me.... i really want to see you ... i cant control my self de...

i wanna scold you de why you lik wont miss me de leh!!! why!!!

and you make me so angry is becos... you say ... misss tell you then enough lo ...

why need to see leh ..>.<>

i really wanna know do you really love me ??

u promise me tat u will bring me out today to go drink beer with ur frens...

but in last minute u dint... hais is jus lik the langkawi trip ....

actually i already know tat u won bring me go de...

jus if u say ok la we go la then at least i will say no wan la u go have fun lo ... i jus wanna test you will bring me or not but in the end hump~~~~!!!!

19 jan ...

today got chance to go out with u lo!!! so happy ... when hug u the time really dun fee lik letting you go !!! i feel lik sleep with u also hug u till i wake up leh .... hahah

at 1st i though when u see me the time u really miss me a lot a lot ...

but after a while u not happy becos something happen ... ( wanna know ask me bah)

but at least u got go hear the whole sales when my fren call me hear de....

at least u got go with me...

20 jan

today i call you out to help me fix my laptop....

but in the end you bring me go pub pulak ... swt za dao 99

but also good de u got bring me go .... hahah ...

you dun let me eat peanut becos u worry of me ... and when u dirve me home de time u keep hold my hand dun let go very very long neve try lik this hold hands de!!!

when i say i go be those pub gurls u stop me dun let me go ;... ahhaha.... i was jus joking la...

and when you cheer with other gurl in front of me actually i ntg de la...

jus wanna fool around with u hahah...

when i reach home u kiss me very very long only let me go ....

look lik u dun wan let me go only .. so long neve see u lik this de ...

21 jan

today kinda happy also de... i reach home from college is abt 5pm de....

i know you finish work at 6 pm .... so tat y i neve sleep jus to get ready my self to go out with u ...

so u dun need to go home n come fetch me so ma fan lo ...

but you 8 pm only finish work...

i though u will tell me u lazy n tired dun wanna see me de... but u dint ...

and u bring me go pasar malam ... but then raining so we buy things then go de....

so u call me to go back the car 2st u go collect the things cox u scare i kena rain...

we go ur house eat dinner... when in ur house u keep smell my hair and kiss my fore head ...

i really wish everyday u also can treat me so good...

22 jan

you suddenly go out station de...

also dunno why de.... very miss u tim dunno why ... may be becos neve hear ur voice gua...

hope u sunday come back can see u lo ....

26 jan

today i see you de!!! actually i only wanna go bank to take money becos got chance to see u ...

hahah jus use this excuse.... then you company me go along ...

and when i go up the car ... i smell got durian smell n i ask u ...

you say u buy for me to eat de.... i really wanna jump de....

then we go ur house to eat durian ... may be you jus wanna see me also gua hahah...

u giv me use ur cheque to pay my school fee...

becos u say carry so many money very dangerous for me.... haha so protective of u !!!

28 jan

very disappointed neve bring me go jogoya ... may be becos i predicted tat ....

marcus will also bring his gf de lo ... hais ... jealous....

31 jan

fri i dye my hair de.... i really wanted you to be the 1st person to see my hair....

but disappointed ... you r very busy with ur work ... but when u call me u scold me !!

hais... actually today i go ur office n peep you ... i know i cant see u de...

so i jus wanna see u from out side..

haha u working without ur cloth on only wear ur pants... so funny ...

so then i go find u excuse was i wana giv u back money ...

then u notice my hair n u tell me it look nicer then my previous hair ... haha i so happy ...

n i notice tat when u see me ... you seem so happy also ... may be becos i find u gus right??

saturday

i go out with my sis to sg wang today jus to buy cny shirt ,... then at night go out with u to go ur fren open house.... ur frens all gamble but at 1st u dint gamble...

may be becos wanna company me gua but in the end ... u gamble also hahah ... u will neve change de la hahah ... i really feel very sien so i go out ... and sit on the swing n think abt us...

dunno why i feel these few days i really feel happy with u ...

but i only feel tat i comapny u do all the things tat u wanna do ...

n neve once was the things i wanna do ... but u dint make me disappointed i though i go out u wont notice at all... but at least u call me twice to ask me go back... when i watching avatar....

u say u will bring me go watch one day ... i really feel wow... i m so touch ... when u say tat word.

sunday ...

i stayed over... and when u wake up u keep on hugging me

i feel so being loved!!! then u tell me abt the work u planned to do ...

then after tat u fetch me home... at night you fetch me out to buy buskin robbins ice cream... then we at ur mom office for few hours...

dunno do wat ... hais ... i really feel very sien n pist off... y u wanna waste 2 hours...

1st feb

its wilayah day ... i though today we can go out together for a movie...

n though u will sleep late...

so neve sms u ... but in the end ... u go ur frens house to gamble... i really kinda pist off...

dunno y i feel so bad... i dunno y i feel lik hais.... dunno

then when at night even i know u bring me out dinner is ur way to tell me ur sorry ...

but i still angry then i suggested break up becos too angry tat neve think b4 wat i say ....

n u accepted...i go ur house ...becos i scare to let u go ....

n when u fetch me home the next day ... u neve even say a thing to me ... i feel we r over de...

hais ... i really feel so heart broken ...

then i ate the 20 tablets of sleeping pills to suicide...

i know it sound stupid... but really feel so upset when i know we r over....

3 feb ...

i control my self not to find u sms or reply ur message.... but u keep on sms me ...

i really feel lik tell u how much i wanna get back together but i stay strong ...

n i know i will cry when i reply u

6 feb

today ... is my 1st day working in cyber cafe i really miss ur voice ... miss u a lot a lot ...

n u dint disappoint me u sms me today ...

becos my fren say u wanna know tat i m ok then u won bother abt me anymore...

but in the end u did sms me .. i feel so so so happy !!!

7 feb

after break up ... today we see each other to cut phone line...

i really miss u a lot a lot... when i see u i wanted to ask u to get back together...

but i dint ... but i cant control de... when u=i gonna reach home...

i really brush de.... i really love u a lot!!! i wanna say it out so loud so loud!!!\\

but in the end we dint get back together but remain as best frens...

becos u say u dun wanna hurt me anymore...

i really feel so up set ... really dun wanna be jus frens... becos i m scare tat other people will take u away from me!!!i m so so so happy when u come to my working place to fetch me home.... really make me feel u care about me.. even u still take me as ur best fren...

i feel so so so in love with u dunno why ... i feel tat no one can replace u anymore in my heart ...

i feel so so so miserable ... i feel so sad i know loving someone doesnt mean i need to get him ...

nut i scare one day ... the one u choose to be with u in the future wont be me ...

i know we r still young ... everything is not stable now... but ... i really wish ... the person i wannna pass my life is with u ... i dunno why ... but when i see you ... with other gurls.. i will jus feel lik a knife cut my heart into two ;... i noe i should look forward but ... i still cant let go of u .... its lik stopping drug .... ur my drug ... my only ....

i m back

finally after a long 2 week of no internet in my house...

due to some reason of raining thunder strike n the bloody tm net neve fix it ...

they take their own sweet time to fix the bloody internet ... hais... so pist off!!!

anyways,... lately i have major things to say ... ahhaha after this post bah ...

hmmm so i went shopping for cny goods!!! hais when it come to near cny ...

i will have bad mood ...

cox i need to think abt money problems...

father nagging me to buy everything ... for cny ...

n money for ang pau n those...!!! ah!!! money !!!

anyways... really very headache!!!

hmmm n i will start to miss my mom becos ... i m not used to do all these...

n now i need to take care of these... its really hard!!! so appreciate wat u have now...

so i went shopping for my new year cloths in sg wang ...

cheap n nice rite... hahah ...i dint really planned to buy anything for cny cloth...

but i can resist when it come to shopping!!!

haha i brough 3 dress one skirt one long pants n it only cost me for rm200

cheap rite... n my mom giv me rm500 to buy cloths...

oh yea i colour my hair again ... it cost me rm 250 /... so ... i got extra rm50 to masuk packet ...

anyways this asam laksa taste really good!!! in sg wang six floor opposite the green box

this too it taste good!!!

then after few days later my sis birthday ...

hahah ... wish u good luck for ur upsr ok ... so so so sorry for the late post of ur birthday ...

cos line problem hahah ... then ... tats it i think ...